Meaning of Love
by jylener22
Summary: Renji and Rukia are both feeling rather doubtful and insecure about their upcoming marriage. How will they overcome this bump in their relationship when they're both reluctant to talk about their misgivings to the other? One-shot story written in honor of Renji's birthday and loosely based on the song 'Beneath Your Beautiful' by Labrinth.


Meaning of Love

It was hard to believe, at times, just how far they had come in their relationship. They had gone from being kids trying to survive in the Rukongai and watching their friends pass on until they were the only two left supporting one another to then trying to survive Soul Reaper Academy together. Then they had gone from being separated by the Kuchiki family name to then being separated by jail cell bars and a death penalty. Next, they had gone back into 'fighting for survival' mode and had once again fought side by side, only this time not only to protect each other, but their nakama as well.

However, what was really difficult for Renji to wrap his mind around most of the time was the fact that Rukia had agreed to marry him. The star had dropped from the sky and into the stray dog's arms. She loved him. Rukia really loved him. That beautiful, intelligent, artistic, strong, beautiful, spunky, quick-witted, stubborn, beautiful, rich, prestigious, out-of-his-league, beautiful…just why had she said yes to him in the first place? And why in the name of all that was good and holy did he ask her at all? What right did he have to marry someone as perfect as Rukia?

Renji was snapped out of his increasingly gloomy mood when an all too familiar, cool tone said matter-of-factly, "You will be late."

Jumping in surprise, Renji's head snapped around and his wide brown eyes connected with a pair of slightly narrowed blue ones as Renji stammered out with a nervous chuckle, "Late? Late for what, Captain?"

Byakuya's face was as inscrutable as ever as he said in a monotone, "If I am not mistaken, Rukia should be about ready to go and enjoy herself at Karakura's End of Summer Festival."

He didn't need to say anymore as Renji suddenly sprang up with a cry and raced out of the room. As he bolted, Renji didn't notice what may have been a slight spark of amusement momentarily lighting up Byakuya's eyes.

Mentally berating himself as he ran, Renji hoped that Rukia wouldn't be too disappointed in him since he was not wearing his dark green yukata that was supposed to match her violet one. Besides Rukia and himself, the group heading over to Karakura consisted of Yumichika, Ikkaku, Rangiku, Shuhei, Toshiro, Momo and Kira and Renji was completely positive that all of them had remembered to dress up properly. This thought was confirmed when he saw his friends and fiancée standing outside the Senkaimon and obviously waiting for him to arrive.

"Took you long enough!" Ikkaku shouted, "I was beginning to think you had forgotten or something."

In the first place, Renji didn't respond to Ikkaku's comment since he was rather winded from running. However, second, and probably more importantly, Renji likely couldn't have come up with anything to say since he was too busy trying to gauge Rukia's reaction to his appearance. Both in the sense that he was late and that he had not dressed up. Her face was completely impassive…a very bad sign. In Renji's mind, he could sense the waves of anger barely being suppressed by the petite woman and it caused his heart to falter.

Now, if either Rukia or Renji had been mind readers or accurate judges of each other's emotions like they usually were, then likely the rest of this story would have carried on smoothly…but as usually happens when one jumps to conclusions, interesting things begin to happen.

When Renji pulled up next to her, Rukia looked up and said matter-of-factly, "You did forget and Brother reminded you."

Her tone and way of talking reminded Renji so much of his Captain that he had to stop himself from taking an involuntary step backwards from Rukia. Before he could respond, Rukia placed a parcel in Renji's hands and his face must have conveyed his unvoiced question as Rukia gave him a small smile and answered him.

"Before I left the house, Brother said that I should bring this along just in case."

Opening the parcel, Renji saw his yukata carefully folded inside. On the one hand, Renji was relieved that Byakuya had thought far enough ahead to keep Renji from embarrassing Rukia and/or the Kuchiki clan. On the other hand, Renji couldn't help but feel ashamed and a little angry that he had to be 'saved' in this manner.

Tugging on Renji's sleeve, Rukia said calmly, "You can change once we get to Urahara's Shop and then we'll meet up with everyone else."

Following her lead, Renji stepped through the Senkaimon and the next step he took was onto the floor of Urahara's Shop. Without glancing up and acknowledging the shop owner or the familiar woman standing next to him, Renji all but stalked into the back room and closed the door in order to change. This night had barely begun and he was already messing it up…great, just great.

* * *

Unbeknownst to Renji, Rukia was having confidence issues of her own tonight. In no way was she embarrassed by Renji's late arrival or was she angry at him for nearly forgetting all about the festival. She had known him for years and so was well aware of the fact that Renji had a hard time remembering events or dates of things that were not directly connected with things that mattered to him, such as the day he had managed to achieve Bankai or when his practice sessions with Ikkaku were or the days he was supposed to train his own squad.

Rukia was fully prepared for a married life when Renji would forget to do something special for their anniversary or any other important event of that kind. While it would be wonderful when he did remember, Rukia was not fazed at all when such minor details were overlooked.

No, Rukia's problem lay in the fact that she didn't feel like a woman tonight. She knew Renji loved her just the way she was, but that didn't stop her from wondering what he thought of her appearance.

When she looked at herself in the mirror this morning, the thought that she looked more like a prepubescent boy than a grown woman struck her and since then Rukia hadn't known a moment's peace. Images started running through her mind of all the females she was acquainted with and slowly Rukia came to feel more and more depressed.

Comparing her figure to everyone from Rangiku (but then again, who could actually compete with that woman?) to Nanao to Nemu to Orihime to Tatsuki to Yoruichi to Soi Fon to Isane to…well, the only two people she could think of who might be in her same predicament were Momo and Hiyori. In Momo's case, even though her figure might not be very curvy, the young woman nearly reeked of feminine poise and bearing. From her soft voice to her tender ways (unless in the middle of battle…but even then, no one would ever mistake her for a boy), Momo was everything Rukia was not. As for Hiyori, well, she had longer hair than Rukia and wore it in pigtails, so unless someone was completely clueless, even Hiyori, with all her rough and tumble ways, would probably not ever be mistaken for a boy.

After having looked at herself in the mirror, Rukia had sat down and tried to make a list of all her strengths and weaknesses in order to cheer herself up…it didn't help. She was a take charge, strong, hard-working, usually no-nonsense, honest, opinionated woman who normally didn't give much thought to her looks.

Looking at her hands, her nails were short and trim since she didn't want the bother of long ones that could potentially break and cause her unnecessary pain in the middle of a battle. Her palms had many rough patches where callouses had formed from years of holding her beloved Sode no Shirayuki. Never before had these bothered her, but now she wished that gripping her sword had not come with such a price.

Then she came to her hair, which she had cut short recently. At the time, Rukia had felt confident in her decision since she had wanted to let go of her past assumptions and feelings about Byakuya adopting her in the Kuchiki clan. Cutting her hair had allowed her to move forward out of Hisana's shadow and into a life Rukia would carve out for herself within the Kuchiki clan as well as Byakuya's home. Now, however, as she continued to nit-pick herself and her appearance, Rukia could only say that such a decision had only solidified her boy-like appearance. While it was possible to add padding underneath her clothes to give off the impression that she did have feminine curves, it would take months or possibly years for her hair to grow back out.

Once the poison had taken root in her mind, Rukia's thoughts eventually became 'What if' questions. What if Renji hadn't grown up with her in Rukongai? Would he have taken the time to get to know her and fall in love with her? What if he did love her because they had known each other so long? What if he only saw her as a best friend and not a real woman? On and on, these thoughts kept spiraling out of control until Rukia was hard pressed to keep her calm composure in place.

When Renji stepped out of the backroom in his yukata, Rukia's face lit up slightly in a genuine smile. He was so handsome with the dark green and gold of the yukata blending nicely with the striking scarlet color of his hair and the black tattoos covering his body. While he was not indecent, the top of the yukata was slightly open so that Rukia could just glimpse Renji's collarbone and a little below that and her heart skipped a beat as she thought about just how powerful and muscular Renji had become over the years. Back in Rukongai, Renji had been a scrawny kid, barely taller or broader than she was. Now, he towered over her, but Rukia did not feel at all intimidated by this fact. Even though Renji could be a bit of an idiot sometimes and was extremely stubborn, he was kind and knew just what to say in order to calm her fears.

She loved him. She loved him as a best friend, a comrade and a man. Renji was a man, through and through. A man whom Rukia had no apprehension or misgivings about entrusting her heart and future to. He would be good to her, Rukia had no doubt about that. She was just beginning to think that maybe she wasn't woman enough to stand next to this man and call herself his lover. His helpmate. His wife.

Shoving these thoughts and feelings aside, Rukia walked over to entwine her arm through Renji's as she said, "Let's get going. The others are waiting for us."

While Renji had been changing and Rukia had been waiting for them, Urahara, Yoruichi and the other Soul Reapers had gone on ahead to meet with their Karakura friends. It wasn't long before Renji and Rukia joined them all in the designated meeting spot.

As soon as the pair came into view, a familiar bubbly, excited voice called out, "Rukia! It's so good to see you!"

Returning the young woman's smile, Rukia let go of Renji's arm in order to embrace her friend as she replied, "Orihime! You look well. How was the honeymoon with Ichigo?"

Before Orihime could answer, Rangiku asked with a laugh, "Yes, Orihime. Do tell! Was Ichigo a gentleman, or did a bit of his dark side come out?"

Blushing furiously, Orihime stammered, "What a thing to ask! I don't think…I'm not sure…"

As per usual, Ichigo stepped in with his signature scowl in place to try and rescue Orihime from her predicament as he all but growled, "I don't really appreciate you asking my wife," Ichigo put special emphasis on the word, "that question."

Completely unaffected by Ichigo's show, Rangiku put on her most wounded expression as she said with a slight pout, "I was just asking a question. And besides," here, Rangiku threw her arm around Orihime's shoulders and gave off the impression that she was trying to protect Orihime from her own husband, "what kind of friend would I be if I didn't make sure that someone as wonderful as Orihime was being treated right?"

"She's got a point there."

Both Ichigo and Orihime looked at the speaker with almost identical expressions of absolute shock on their faces. Then, Orihime's face flushed even more as her expression became absolutely dumbfounded, while Ichigo's face flushed but took on a more furious look.

"Tatsuki! What are you saying?" exclaimed Orihime pitifully.

"Yeah! Just what are you trying to get at, Tatsuki?" chimed in Ichigo in a barely restrained snarl.

Crossing her arms and shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly, Tatsuki replied, "I just said that Rangiku has a point. What good friend wouldn't want to know for sure that someone they cared about was being treated right?"

Cutting off the Kurosaki couple's outbursts with an upheld palm, Tatsuki went on, "I'm not saying that Rangiku's questions should be taken seriously because I know that if you were hurting Orihime in any way, Ichigo, that it would be totally obvious to everyone. Orihime is easier to read than an elementary textbook and in certain cases Ichigo is as well. All I'm saying is that the basic idea of looking out for one's friends and making sure they are all right is quite sound."

Giving Rangiku a pointed look, Tatsuki finished with, "However, I think Ichigo and Orihime are right to protest having to give out any information about such private matters."

Stepping next to Rangiku and holding out his hand, Shuhei said with a slight tinge of red in his cheeks, "C'mon Rangiku. Let's go check out what kind of treats they have."

Clapping her hands excitedly, Rangiku then grabbed Shuhei's hand and dragged him behind her as she squealed, "I hope they have tasty dumplings here! Oh, and sweet bean buns! Oh, and…"

There was silence for a few seconds before Uryu adjusted his glasses and said in a deadpan, "I certainly hope Shuhei has a healthy bankroll tonight. Rangiku's appetite for food and fashion is quite hefty most of the time, but I'm guessing tonight she will be nearly insatiable."

Tugging lightly on Uryu's elbow in reproach, Yuzu informed her boyfriend, "There's nothing wrong with Rangiku asking Shuhei for things if he's willing to buy them for her. Especially if she's asking for food since she's hungry."

Blinking in confusion, Uryu said slowly, "I didn't say there was anything wrong with Rangiku getting Shuhei to buy her things from the festival."

Now it was Yuzu's turn to blink owlishly up into Uryu's blue eyes before giving him a half bashful half apologetic smile as she said, "Oh, I see."

Returning Yuzu's smile with a small, warm one of his own, Uryu interlocked their fingers and said, "Speaking of food, let's go see what they have."

Turning to his wife, Ichigo asked with a half grin, "So, shall we see what we can find around here?"

Shaking her head, Orihime linked her arms through Tatsuki and Rukia's as she answered, "Not right now, but I'll meet up with you a little later," looking at her friends, Orihime asked, "Is that all right with you guys?"

Tatsuki grinned and nodded while Rukia answered with a grin, "Sure, sounds like fun."

Looking around her, Rukia asked, "Wouldn't Momo like to come with us as well if we're going to divide into groups?"

Jerking his thumb behind him, Ikkaku answered, "Oh, the midget captain high-tailed it out of here as soon as Rangiku started making a spectacle of herself. He was also pulling Momo along with him, so she's accounted for."

"And what about Karin and Chad?" asked Rukia, "I haven't seen them at all yet."

Shaking his head and grinning, Ichigo said, "Oh, those two slipped away before you and Renji even arrived. I think Chad caught a glimpse of some cute stuffed animals or something and Karin took off after him."

To the other men, Ichigo said, "Well, since the women seem to be kicking us out, might as well hang out together," with a pointed look at Ikkaku and Renji, Ichigo said warningly, "Just remember that this is a festival where people are supposed to get along. That means no busting out of your gegais in order to battle unless there is no other option."

"Tck, speak for yourself," scoffed Ikkaku, "There's no way I passing up a good fight if the opportunity presents itself."

As the men walked off insulting one another and bickering like they usually did, Tatsuki let out a sigh and said flatly, "I really do hope they find some abandoned alley way or open field to fight in when the time comes. The last thing we need is for reports of mysterious earthquakes and property damage to show up on the 11 o'clock news."

With a nervous laugh, Orihime said in a half convinced tone, "Oh, I'm sure they won't fight at all…at least, I hope they don't fight."

Keeping her arms linked through her two friends, Orihime started walking in the opposite direction as she said in a firmer tone, "However, we don't have time to worry about them right now. We need to find somewhere to talk privately."

Looking at her long-time friend, Tatsuki asked, "Why? Can't we just chit-chat out here in the open?"

"Not right at the moment," Orihime replied before turning and giving Rukia a kind, knowing look, "I have a feeling what we're going to talk about is something best kept to ourselves at the moment."

It wasn't until they found a bench to sit on away from the happy, enthusiastic crowds that Orihime turned to Rukia and asked gently but firmly, "All right, what is bothering you?"

Taking in a sharp breath, Rukia fumbled in confusion, "What are you talking about?"

Giving Rukia a knowing smile, Orihime explained, "It was very faint, but before I greeted you I sensed that you were troubled about something. So, if you're comfortable talking about whatever it is, I'd like to see if there's anything Tatsuki and I can do to help you."

Filling her lungs slowly, Rukia took those moments to try and process what Orihime had just said as well as put her own thoughts and emotions in order before she started talking.

Hesitant, Rukia said softly, "Well, it's like this…" and after those initial four, faltering words everything else just came tumbling out. In one sense, Rukia felt as though her voice kept going on for hours and hours, while on the other hand, as her tale effortlessly unfolded for her friends to hear, it seemed as though barely any time passed. When she was finished, no one spoke for a minute or two until Tatsuki broke the silence.

"So, in a nutshell, you don't think you deserve to be happy and in love because you're not 'woman enough'? Is that it?"

Cocking her head to the side, Rukia said thoughtfully, "I don't know…maybe."

Crossing her arms, Tatsuki nodded her head and asked pointedly, "All right, what's the definition of a woman?"

"What do you mean?"

Shrugging her shoulders, Tatsuki said bluntly, "Well, you're saying you're not enough of a woman to make Renji really happy, so I'd like to you tell me what you think a real woman should look and act like. Because I sure don't understand how you can't see yourself this way."

Gesturing pathetically with her hands, Rukia said, "Well, look at me and then look at you two!"

Quirking an eyebrow at Rukia, Tatsuki asked, "What about us?"

Standing up and patting her chest and hips, Rukia explained, "I'm as flat as a rail and you two are not. No one would ever mistake you for a ten-year-old boy when they look at you. Whereas I…"

Leaning forward slightly, Orihime asked softly, "Has anyone ever told you this before?"

Blinking, Rukia answered with a question, "Told me what before?"

"That you look like a ten-year-old boy, of course."

Opening her mouth a couple of times, Rukia thought furiously before she answered slowly, "Well…no, no I don't think so."

Adjusting her arms across her chest, Tatsuki said with a grin, "That's because no one sees you as a prepubescent boy. You exude way too much confidence and poise most of the time to be mistaken for anything other than a grown woman.

"Besides, comparing your figure against women like Orihime or Rangiku, you're not being fair to yourself. Most of the female population can't come close to the kind of curves they've acquired through simple genetics unless those same females get the curves artificially."

With a slightly red face, Orihime continued, "That aside, like Tatsuki said, no one has ever said that you act or look like anything other than a woman, so I'm curious where all these thoughts started coming from. If I had to take a guess, it probably all started when you began planning and preparing for your wedding. Am I right?"

Pausing, Rukia said reflectively, "Umm…let's see…maybe…possibly…actually, I think you're right," wide-eyed, Rukia asked Orihime in an awed tone, "How did you know?"

Reaching out to grasp Rukia's hand in her own, Orihime answered kindly, "Because I felt the same way a little while before my wedding and then a bit on my wedding day as well. I think most brides go through this stage where they feel insecure and nervous about…well, just about anything. Getting married is a big step in a person's life and it's not something to be taken lightly."

Taking Rukia's other hand, Orihime finished with, "The best advice I think Tatsuki or I could give you at this point is to go and talk to Renji about what you're feeling."

Cutting off Rukia's protests by standing up and giving the Soul Reaper's hand a light squeeze, Orihime went on, "Renji is going to be your husband soon enough and he will be the person you will need to go in all things. The two of you are going to be one flesh and one soul and are going to need to work together. Might as well start practicing now."

Wrapping an arm around Rukia's shoulders, Orihime said with a broad grin, "Besides, Renji might have a slightly different point of view when you tell him your feelings."

* * *

While the men had continued bickering with one another for a good fifteen minutes after leaving the women, Tatsuki's predictions of them getting into an all-out-brawl were fortunately proved false. Eventually, Ikkaku noticed that Renji had barely spoken a word even though the Vice-Captain had been insulted at least four times in as many minutes, so being the concerned friend he was, Ikkaku tried asking what was wrong.

"Hey Renji! You look like a dog that was kicked by his master and the master's family and then all the master's servants. Knock it off already!"

Much to everyone's surprise, Renji merely gave Ikkaku a half dirty look and mumbled, "Just leave me alone, you idiot."

The rest of the group exchanged shocked and perplexed looks and nonverbally asked each other to say something to Renji. In actuality, what they considered to be questions were not so, but rather glares and threatening gestures given from one to another. After a few moments of this ridiculous behavior, Ichigo took it upon himself to be the 'mature' one in the group.

"Hey, something bugging you, Renji?"

Once again, Renji surprised everyone by actually answering the question rather than beating about the bush or trying to 'act tough' and bluff it out.

"Yeah, actually there is."

Scowling at the ground and then looking at Ichigo, Renji asked, "What in the world am I doing? I must be crazy, right?"

Giving Renji a confused frown of his own, Ichigo said flatly, "Well, maybe if I knew in the world you were talking about, I might be able to answer you."

Before Renji could answer, Ikkaku snorted, "What do you mean? Of course he's crazy!"

Renji blinked and took a half step back in surprise as he asked blankly and almost pathetically, "I am?"

Crossing his arms, Ikkaku said scornfully, "Yeah you are. You're crazy if you think you can fit any more of those crazy tattoos anywhere else. So just forget it."

It took a moment for Renji to process Ikkaku's outlandish comment, but then his whole demeanor became a little more volatile as he retorted, "What are you talking about, you bald freak?! Who said anything about me wanting to get more tattoos? And they're not crazy! They're-"

Throwing his head back and laughing loudly, Ikkaku then looked back at Renji and said in a satisfied tone, "That's more like it. I hate it when you're all mopey."

Cutting in so that the bickering could be kept to a minimum, Yumichika asked curiously, "Anyway, just like Ichigo asked a minute ago, what are you talking about, Renji? We can't give you very good advice if we don't know what you're talking about."

Closing his eyes and scratching his forehead in frustration, Renji took a few seconds before he answered, "I'm talking about Rukia. There must be something wrong with me if I think I can actually make her happy."

Rolling his eyes, Ichigo said reproachfully, "This crap again?"

When Renji's head snapped up and his fists clenched, Ichigo leveled a stony glare at the vice-captain and went on, "We already went through all this before you even proposed to Rukia. She said yes to you, didn't she?"

"Well, yeah, but-"

Holding up a hand, Ichigo interrupted, "But nothing. Rukia said yes."

Grinning at Renji and then Ichigo, Ikkaku added, "Yeah, she did. And if I remember correctly, she's very nearly the one who popped the question because you were too wound up."

Returning Ikkaku's grin, Ichigo chuckled, "Yeah, that's true. She's also the one who kissed Renji."

During this entire exchange, Renji's face had taken on an expression that was torn between utter embarrassment and violent rage. Evidently, Yumichika had decided that rather than allowing this discussion to end in blows, he would be the referee and bring things back under control.

"Be that as it may," Yumichika said in an even tone, "Renji, they are correct in saying that you did propose to Rukia and she did say yes. So, what I would like to know is why these thoughts about you not being 'good enough'," here he made quotation marks in the air, "for Rukia?"

Switching from scratching to massaging his forehead, Renji answered gruffly, "Because I'm not good enough for Rukia, don't you see? She's so smart and beautiful and talented and amazing and beautiful and important and strong and so beautiful and I'm just…" throwing his hands in the air in frustration, Renji nearly shouted, "And I'm me!"

Completely unimpressed with Renji's speech, Ikkaku said drolly, "Yeah, you're you. What's your point?"

Glaring at his long-time friend, Renji retorted, "What's my point? My point is that I don't deserve someone like her!"

Pointing an accusing finger at Ichigo, he spat, "You know just how miserably I failed Rukia when she was arrested," swiveling his hand around to point at Ikkaku, "And you know about all the crap that went on before that," throwing his hands in the air again, Renji asked furiously, "Just what have I done to deserve her? What can I possibly give Rukia that she doesn't already have?"

Silence fell over the group for about a minute before Yumichika said scornfully, "In answer to your question, you've done nothing to deserve," he put special emphasis on the word, "Rukia at all."

Looking as though he had been slapped, Renji started to say something, but Yumichika cut him off as he stepped towards Renji and went on, "As to what you can give to Rukia that she doesn't already have, are you really that stupid? What nonsense! Like Rukia would need," once again Yumichika drew out the word, "anything from you. Just how moronic can you be?"

Jabbing a rigid finger into Renji's chest, Yumichika said snippily, "You say you're in love with Rukia, but it sounds to me that you're so wrapped up in yourself that you can't actually think about what Rukia might feel about all this. She's even told you before that she loves you," as he spoke those three words, Yumichika sharply poked Renji in the chest, "yet you're calling this woman a liar about her own feelings because you're absolutely convinced that she's too good for you. Quit being such an arrogant blockhead!"

Ikkaku let out a whistle and asked his friend, "Wow. When did you become such an expert on love?"

Whipping his head around, Yumichika narrowed his eyes at Ikkaku and said fiercely, "I'm just tired of this big buffoon carrying on like this. It's been going on for far too long and he needs to grow up and be a man where Rukia is concerned. At this rate he really will turn into someone who doesn't deserve Rukia Kuchiki."

Apparently having switched roles with Yumichika along the way, Ichigo stepped in before Renji could hit his vain, but completely in the right, friend by saying quickly, "Renji, he's right when he says that there is nothing you can do to deserve Rukia's love," as Renji turned to level a murderous scowl at him, Ichigo went on firmly, "because she's already given it to you. All you have to do is accept her love and give her yours in return."

Rubbing the back of his neck, Ichigo said with a sigh, "I'm married to Orihime, but I'm definitely no expert on love and marriage. However, I can tell you with all certainty that you need to go and talk to Rukia about this. I think you already know what she's going to say, but even still, you need to go and actually hear it for yourself before you'll actually believe the words. Take it from someone who's done it before."

Renji remained frozen for a time before he nodded curtly and strode off in the direction of the festival. When he reached out to sense where Rukia was, he was surprised and rather relieved that she seemed to be seeking him out as well. However, then it dawned on him that Rukia's Spiritual Pressure was rather disturbed like his was and unconsciously Renji started to walk faster.

* * *

The couple's paths intercepted one another's a short ways away from the festival on a little hill. They walked over to stand in front of one another in silence for a time as they both tried to think of what to say first.

"Orihime and the others-"

"I was told by Ichigo that-"

They both stopped for a second before they tried again.

"Oh, you go first."

"What did you say?"

It seemed as though they were about to speak overtop of one another a third time before Renji said firmly, "Ladies first," to which Rukia responded with a slight roll of her eyes before she began playing with the sleeves of her yukata and looking over to her right.

"Well…it's like this. I just came to ask you something because Orihime and the others said I should and ask you the question since we're going to be married and all so I came to find you and ask if you think I'm attractive or not."

While Rukia didn't rush her words and spoke quite clearly, it wasn't surprising that her question completely threw Renji for a loop and so he asked blankly, "What?"

Looking torn between wanting to hit him or running away to hide, Rukia shifted her weight from foot to foot for a moment or two before all her pent up emotions came tumbling out.

"I was just talking to Orihime and Tatsuki and they said I was being ridiculous for thinking that you might not think that I was a woman because of how I look. They said that just because I don't think I look like a woman since my figure is board-like and theirs are the usual feminine hourglass shape that no one else sees me that way, especially you, so it's all just in my head. They convinced me to come and talk to you about it because we're going to get married and that you might tell me something to make me believe that you actually see me as a grown woman and someone who deserves to marry you. So I want to know what you see when you look at me."

Once Rukia was finished, neither said anything for a time, then Renji broke the silence, saying flatly, "Wow. We really are fools in love."

Frowning up at Renji, Rukia asked incredulously, "What?"

Holding up his hands, Renji quickly backpedaled as he said, "No, no, no! All I meant is that it sounds like we were both worried about something before we even came here."

"What are you talking about?"

Rubbing the back of his neck and looking back and forth between the ground and Rukia's face, Renji said sheepishly, "Well, to be honest, I was having trouble before we came here just thinking about how you're you and I'm me and that we…well, now I see how silly it all is."

Looking completely lost, Rukia reached out to grab hold of Renji as she asked again desperately with just a hint of impatience, "What are you talking about Renji? You haven't answered my question!"

Now it was Renji's turn to look confused before the meaning of Rukia's words sank in and he gently lifted up his hands to cup Rukia's face. He didn't say anything right away, but looked steadily into Rukia's eyes as he tried to come up with the right words to say.

"Rukia, I can't think of a woman stronger, more intelligent, more beautiful or more perfect for me than you are. I…I…"

Even though Renji ran out of words to say, Rukia seemed to understand what he was trying to tell her since she threw her arms around his neck. Wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his face in her hair, Renji simply held Rukia. They stood stock still with their arms around each other until they simultaneously pulled apart to look at the other for a moment before they both leaned forward.

A split second before their lips were about to meet, the sky erupted with vivid, colorful fireworks that seemed to shake the earth. Automatically, both Renji and Rukia looked up at the night sky to marvel at the sight as well as the timing. Then, turning back to look at one another with matching grins they leaned forward once again and this time they connected.

The kiss was hesitant at first, but gradually both Renji and Rukia decided to take a chance and try to show the other just how much they loved the other. The result was indescribable.

It was a while before they rejoined their friends, but when they did everyone noticed the change in the couple. They were holding hands, grinning and looking quite at ease with one another. Orihime and Rangiku went into raptures, Ikkaku tried to get a rise out of Renji but the rest of the evening passed amicably on all sides.

Just before midnight, Rukia pulled Renji down so that she could whisper in his ear, "Happy Birthday, Renji."

Turning his body so that he could shield her, Renji bent down to answer her with another kiss. If any of the others noticed what they were doing, they wisely decided not to say anything. Better to let them have their moment.

**Author's Note:**

So, this is a one-shot story I decided to write in honor of Renji's birthday, if you hadn't already guessed. The inspiration for this story partially came from the song 'Beneath Your Beautiful' by Labrinth. I just find that song to be absolutely beautiful and I just think it fits these two quite nicely. Also, during the course of my chats with Magdalena88, we talked about what kinds of insecurities Renji and Rukia might have, so that played a part in this story as well.

Hope you guys liked it! It's been a while since I've written with these two as the main characters, so it was a nice change.


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